Work With Me

When Your Relationship Feels Like Work... and Still Isn't Working

You’re trying. And maybe you’ve been trying for a while. Trying to communicate better. Trying not to trigger each other. Trying to hold it together, for the kids, for the history, for the hope. But it’s exhausting. And some days, it feels like you’re more like housemates, enemies, or strangers than a couple.

The Pain Often Sounds Like This:

We keep having the same argument, nothing ever gets resolved. Feel more alone in this relationship than I ever did on my own. They shut down or walk away the second it gets uncomfortable. I can’t say anything without it becoming a fight. We’ve stopped being affectionate, stopped talking, stopped trying. I’m walking on eggshells, or I’ve become emotionally numb. One of us is always chasing. The other is always avoiding. We’ve done therapy before… but nothing actually changed. I don’t know if I even like them anymore. And I hate that thought. 

This Isn’t Traditional Couples Therapy

If you’re looking for a therapist who jumps straight into joint sessions and just “manages the middle” of your arguments, this won’t be the right fit.

Because real change doesn’t start between you. It starts within you.

That’s why I begin every process with solo sessions for each partner. To give both of you the space to slow down, speak honestly, and reflect, without being reactive or performative.

We can’t change what’s happening in the relationship until we understand:
  • Why your nervous system reacts the way it does
  • Why certain comments trigger you
  • What you learned about love and conflict growing up
  • How your attachment style shapes the way you relate, withdraw, or over function

Only then do we bring it back into the room, together. Joint sessions are supported with ongoing individual check-ins to keep the progress personal as well as relational. 

A few things worth knowing…

Helpful hints for when it feels a bit much

12 sessions
8 sessions
4 sessions

    Book Your Free Discovery Call

    I offer a 20-minute call to speak with one partner or both. There’s no pressure, no commitment, just a space to talk through what’s going on and whether this process feels like the right support.

    Let’s begin, gently.

    Request Your Free Discovery Call

    Frequently Asked Questions: Online Couples Therapy

    Why do you start with solo sessions first?

    Because change begins with personal insight. When each partner has space to understand their emotional responses, attachment style, and coping strategies, they come into joint sessions more grounded, and less defensive.

    Will we still have joint sessions together?

    Yes. After individual sessions, we’ll meet jointly to work on the relational dynamic. Solo sessions continue alongside as needed to support progress and reduce conflict.

    Can this help even if only one of us is motivated?

    Yes. Even if just one partner is ready to reflect and shift, it can change the dynamic significantly. Solo work can begin even if your partner isn’t ready yet.

    What kinds of tools do you use in couples therapy?

    We explore emotional regulation, attachment patterns, communication repair strategies, love languages, conflict cycles, and deeper needs beneath the surface arguments.

    What if we’ve already tried couples therapy and it didn’t work?

    That’s often the case with new clients. Most couples therapy focuses only on communication techniques. My approach goes deeper, into nervous system regulation, relational triggers, and the emotional history you both bring into the room.

    Work With Me

    If you need Me, I'm here